Modern Cleo

Columbo Vs Sherlock

The internet: good for almost anything, including gathering together all the strange questions that matter to people from all over the world. Questions that need answering! Questions which keep thousands awake every single night!

One such seminal question I’ve just stumbled across is this one: who would win in a fight between Sherlock Holmes and the excellent Columbo?

At first the answer to this seemed gob-smackingly obvious: “Sherlock Holmes!” I yelled. “Columbo would take too long saying ‘just one more thing’ and Holmes would knock him flat on his back!” That’d be it for Columbo: game over, what a shock!

Then I got to my senses and realized there were many other factors to take into consideration: such as that Columbo has a knack–some might say a sixth-sense–for surprising people when they least expect it; and not just once, any time he likes, as though the whole vague-detective thing were only an act…not to mention all his other ways of using devious, clever, psychological techniques to baffle his intended victim.

But–What about Sherlock? He’s a serious contender and a half. S.H. was the original crime-fighter, wasn’t he? So he’d have to have so much more experience than Columbo—he was fighting villains before Columbo was even conceived! Not to mention the brand new Sherlock Holmes is ten times fitter than Columbo ever was, even in his prime–

All this points to one thing: it’s all very unfair on poor old Columbo. Because, let’s face it, Sherlock will always be more famous than Columbo, no matter what anyone says, and how much Columbo goes to the gym. So that’s who I’m going to side with: I say that the under-dog would win. What a piece of television that fight would be!

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